What is that smell?

In the open-ended list of nasty smells, the first one is mice shit. This is at the top, doesn’t smell too bad, but it ain’t roses either.

Going down the list from the top, things start getting worse…

At 5 there’s dog shit on the sole of your shoe…

At 37 there’s Donald Trump…

And somewhere in between the last two is Piers Morgan.

Morgan used to be a journalist, but now he’s become nothing short of the Daily Mails go-to superstar who intervenes trying to give some credibility to the worthless junk pedaled by the Mail. Doesn’t really work – most people who understand verbs can shoot holes in pretty much all of the rubbish he writes, but it can be mildly entertaining – emphasis on the « mildly »

He’s been busy slagging off the Donald recently – a thankless affair as despite all the criticisms, fact-checking etc. the man just won’t go away. But it does provide a relief from stories about Kim and her enormous arse, or Madonna and her saggy tits. But it smells.

This man has been photographed interviewing Trump, shaking hands with Trump, God knows what else with Trump…and I can’t help thinking it’s just another way for the Donald to get his name in print…

It’s fairly clear after the last 3 years or so, that’s all he’s really in this for, sadly.

« F**k the US, what’s in it for me » says Donald/Piers etc.

Strange happenings, stranger people

This person is Helen Degenerate – and he/she/it is a thoroughly nice person, really. He or should I say ‘she’ dresses up in mens clothing and has a television show in the United States. He/she/it considers him/herself/itself a comedien.

He/she/it is a classic know-it-all, been there, done that cross-dressing straight/gay person, and as such, by all accounts, is pretty full of him/her/itself.

« By all accounts » comes from a dozen or so people who have worked for this « person », and don’t consider him/her/it either very funny, nor, and this is more important, to actually ‘like’ or appreciate anyone other than he/she/itself. Infact of course this doesn’t really matter – who cares if he/she/it is a right real PITA – aside from the people who work for him/her/it!!

During the confinement in the US, he/her/it laid off a number of the technical staff who work on the famous « show » – and then decided to do the show from his/her/it’s house with a whole new crew! Not unnaturally, the original crew who were now unemployed were, how can I put this, justifiably pissed?

Well, let’s face it, when you think you’re a God, better act like one…

VERY Frightening

Simple excercise in mathematics;-

Multiply 60 (minutes) by 24 (hours) and you get 1440 (minutes in a day)

Yesterday, 29 July 2020 there were 1500 deaths attibuted to the COVID-19 virus in the United States.

This is more than one death for every single minute of the day.

Wake up you idiots – this is NOT going away quote ‘magically’ unquote Donald Trump, when the weather gets warmer.

Not wearing masks and not respecting social distancing DOES NOT make it go away.

Believing Doctors selling snake oïl remedies ‘made from alien DNA’ DOES NOT make it go away either.

Do SOMETHING for Christs sake – and fast, or worrying about the state of the economy will be the least of your concerns – there won’t be enough people left to RUN the economy.

Get rid of the orange haired baboon – he’s the one who needs a government health warning…

Mistaken Identity

This man, Reginald Stonk, 34 Thurberry Mews, South Shields, maintains that he is prettier than the the one-time singer Madonna – what do you think?

Heavy Lifting

Airbus A400

We’re just getting reports that Kim Kardashians arse has just been flown back to California from Wyoming.

Sadly, reports suggest that the rest of her body was still attached to it…

More on this as this story develops.

Medicines made from alien DNA?

Donald Duck, sorry, Trump

In my opinion, this man is an idiot. More so, a very dangerous idiot. He is followed and « appreciated » by a huge number of fellow idiots who seem to believe everything he says.

The latest bullshit, sorry, facts are these: a group of American doctors have published a video saying, essentially, that protective face masks don’t have to be worn and that the drug hydroxychloroquine is a cure for the corona virus, all this against established wisdom.

Obviously the Donald goes along with this, and simply cannot understand why people are doubting the words of Dr Stella Immanuel who is known for her statements regarding the « cure » for the Covid-19 and the fact that some medicines are made from alien DNA…

The White House correspondent for CNN Kaitlan Collins disagreed with Trump and commented “The woman that you said was a ‘great doctor’ in that video that you retweeted last night said that masks don’t work and there is a cure for Covid-19, both of which health experts say is not true.”

“She’s also made videos saying that doctors make medicine using DNA from aliens and that they’re trying to create a vaccine to make you immune from becoming religious.”

The Daily Beast further commented “She has often claimed that gynecological problems like cysts and endometriosis are in fact caused by people having sex in their dreams with demons and witches. She alleges alien DNA is currently used in medical treatments, and that scientists are cooking up a vaccine to prevent people from being religious, »

Quick – get Kanye West sworn in as President- he can’t possibly be any worse…can he?

UPDATE – as if we needed any more proof that the world has gone apeshit, MADONNA (aka « I’m really ugly but just look at my tits ») has now chimed in with an Instagram post praising the ‘Alien DNA’ doctor, Stella Immanuel.

So I guess it must be true……

Kim? Kanye? F**kme?

It seems Desmond « call me Ye » Gumby (aka Mr K. West esq) has finally bust a bloodvessel and after accusing everyone, but not of course himself, of just about every world ill, has checked himself into a hospital – « cos he’s fucking nuts » as a source close to the « star » recently said. It appears he has apologised to his wife, children, Donald Duck etc. for being such a prize wanker – what this will change? Heaven only knows.

His wife, former sex-tape star Kim « brain dead » Kardashian has recently been accused of bursting into tears. No one actually knows why, but as everything she does is examined at microscopic level by the tabloid press, we will no doubt soon learn the real reason. It could be that she’s pissed that she’ll never be « First Lady » after her husbands failed attempt to stand for President of the United States. (A spokesperson commented « Not that she actually knows ANYTHING about being a lady anyway… »)

The REAL question on the tip of my tongue is…do we actually care?

Answer – not a lot.

Her only claim to fame, aside from an arse the size of Canterbury, is that she has bought a series of children (poor sods) – but is this news, you ask? (In case you wondered, the correct answer is « No »)

Well apparently to some bottom feeders, like this particular family, who basically share a single brain cell, this IS news, and we should all have this forced down our throats at every opportunity.

Personally I prefer peanut butter

Hyperion Camera Straps

I was recently looking around for a new camera strap – something that was very flexible and fell easily out of my way when I picked the camera up. I came across Hyperion Camera Straps and thought I’d give one a try…

These are made by a photographer, Pavlos KOUTSOUKOS, in Greece – he originally made one for himself, and pretty soon all his friends wanted the same thing so he started a small business to make these straps from acrylic cord in various colour ways.

Hyperion Camera Straps

They are available in 4 lengths, and I strongly suggest you visit his site – link – to see all the different colours available. I find the 1M20 length the most comfortable for me, but there are other lengths available – and the amazing thing is that the prices start at only 15€.

First you choose your strap colour, then the binding colour – this way you can personalise every strap. The acrylic material is very strong and flexible and serves my purposes perfectly as it falls easily when I pick up the camera. The models I chose are made from the round cord, but a flatter version exists too, and also a very nice looking real leather version which I haven’t tried….yet…. 🙂

Sometimes the shipping takes a while – we joke about Uncle Stavros’s donkey transporting the packets, but the postal system usually manages to deliver to France in 2 to three weeks.

SMALLRIG

For as long as I can remember, I have always appreciated well made objects – even when they are completely useless – if they’re well produced, I’m a fan!

Smallrig is a Chinese setup in Shenzen, just next to Hong Kong but in mainland China. They have been producing camera accessories for a while now, and they are all exquisitely designed, and made from high quality machined alluminium. I have purchased a ‘grip’ for the Z series Nikon mirrorless, and various ‘L’ plates for other cameras, and the quality and pricing is excellent.

Smallrig L bracket 2258 for Nikon Z

This bracket lets me use the quick release ‘Arca‘ style mounts for horizontal or vertical camera mounting, that I use on all of my tripods.

Smallrig have just announced a new camera cage for the Z series – this will be useful for people who use the camera for video as there are mounts designed for holding external screens, microphones, handles etc. which simply bolt-on to the cage. It’s hard to believe this will retail at 45$.

Smallrig Z series camera cage 2972

For the sort of things I do, the only thing missing is an Arca mount on the bottom and to the side – perhaps Smallrig have plates which can be added-on…? It seems obvious to me, using a tripod, but I can see that this is not always necessary for someone hand-holding the camera.

Take a look at their site – it’s well worth a trip…www.smallrig.com

Changes at Associated Press

One of the largest, and well respected press agencies, Associated Press has just announced an exclusive partnership with SONY for all their photographic needs (Still & video).

While I can see, from a purely ‘mechanical’ point of view, the advantages with everyone using the same basic setup, I can’t help thinking that this sort of exclusivity can only lead to the AP photographers being tied to the whim of SONY who may or may not ‘lsiten’ to it’s user base regarding future developments – with a captive audience, there is always this risk.

The current situation is far from ideal as the market is changing rapidly with the advent of the mirrorless camera, and that’s why I think it’s good to ‘use’ this competition between manufacturers to get the very best from any particular innovation, or more, proposed innovation.

Canon, Nikon and Sony make some extremely good picture making machines – but all with sublte différences that professional users use to their advantage. The simple fact that you can all share batteries or lenses if you’re all using the same camera only really comes into play at sports events covered by numerous ‘pool’ photographers (The Olympics comes to mind – however, both Canon and Nikon go to great lengths to provide professionals covering the Olympics with enormous amounts of ‘loaned’ camera Equipment – will Sony do this?)

This is obviously terrifc marketing for SONY, and I wish them well – however it would be interesting to get the point of view of a few of the AP photographers pool…